I have experienced a great deal of healing in my sexuality this past year, and I understand now--as I have never understood before--that sexuality is at its essence a deeply holistic, natural part of our lives.

It is, in sum, a complete union of body, mind, soul, and spirit between two beings knit together by love.

Christianity (or at least the Christianity many of us have come to know and revile in the United States) does not allow people to express real love to each other--and this, not rampant, wanton sexual activity, is the real tragedy of our culture today. "Where there is no vision, the people perish" and "people perish for lack of knowledge" are two proverbs from the Bible with which I am very familiar, and yet it does not seem as if the religious community in America is interested in dishing out more to the knowledge-starved men and women of their communities than a series of rather love-less do's and don'ts regarding sex.

Personally, I don't believe one can talk about sex without having a clear concept of love--and sadly, it may be for this reason that the church's response in this area lacks heart. I wish the church spent more time promoting love and less time promoting a doctrine, a cause, or a religion. I wish the church spent more time listening to others rather than warning and lecturing them. And I wish the church spent more time practicing the words of Jesus than arguing about what those words mean.